Jumping Rainbows

Freedom aproaching once again... It's long overdue

  Although I'm not sure exactly how to put this into words, for some reason I feel compelled to share it with someone...anyone.  I will warn you though that if some of you don't like reading about when others are in pain, this probably isn't the blog entry for you to read.
  Okay, now that I have my disclaimer out of the way, here it is: for the last four months or so, I have had to wear a depend 24 hours a day, seven days a week.  I don't think I'm going to get into the specific reason here, although there is one, because I don't think it's particularly relevant to the entry.  Now, it's not really having to wear the depend that has left me feeling incredibly trapped.  I wore one for 21 years while I was growing up because the bathroom in our house at the time was not at all accessible, which made using it impossible. 

  No, that's not it at all.  What it is, is that during the entire year of 2004 I worked extremely hard to get myself into underwear.  After much hard work, I was successful, and up until Thanksgiving of last year, (2007) I was in underwear all the time.  My bladder muscles were even strong enough that I wasn't having any accidents at all.  In my opinion, this is huge when you consider the fact that prior to 2004 I basically had no bladder control whatsoever.   

  Anyway, it all started to go downhill around Thanksgiving of last year.  This was when my body started doing really stupid shit for no apparent reason.  Yell  Because I could feel when it was happening, but had absolutely no ability to stop it, I decided that my only option, although it was going to be hell, was to go back into a depend all the time.  So, that's exactly what I've done.  Frown
  Now, here I sit almost exactly 4 months later still in a depend.  However, I am happy, happy, happy to report that there is finally going to be a permanent solution for this problem.  Smile  Hopefully, after April 8th, I will be able to say goodbye to the prospect of using a depend on a consistent basis, and only use them when they're meant to be used...on extremely long trips, or overnight.  Smile  So, although I haven't entered what Daniel and some others would call a perfect world, ha ha, to be back in underwear and feel that freedom brings me one step closer!  Smile

More Posts by Danielle